He shifted to put an arm around him, and listened quietly. "Very young," he commented. But then, many shinobi children were forced to grow up quickly. It was just what the world--this world--was like. And the thought that he could fix it if he wanted to came to him, the way it so often did when he thought something was sad or unfair. He could rewrite everything. Rearrange what was, what would be. Create a dream more lovely than reality.
He pushed the thought to the back of his mind, like he always did.
"Well. I'm proud of you, you know. For all of that."
"I was the youngest ANBU captain Konoha has ever had." It was a murmur, and he settled close to him. "I've had to fight tooth and nail to prove that my appointment isn't a sign that Konoha has weakened. Sometimes I wonder. I had more than half my ANBU change over when I came into office because they couldn't countenance the idea of being under my direct command so much of the time because of my age. There have been other shows of disrespect too." He paused, smirked. "But I found a solution to -that- at least."
"If they're going to doubt that I -pay attention- then they can deal with babysitting four year old civilian children. I don't care if they -are- elite jounin."
"I wouldn't have been able to pull off subtle... or any of that. I would have lasted about three weeks as hokage and then either lost interest and given it up, or been taken down by my underlings."
He turned his head and rubbed his cheek into his shoulder. "I had time to ease into it. First paperwork, then mission assignment. It was hard the first time I sent someone out and they didn't come back though."
He drew him just a little closer, tilting his head to lean his cheek against Itachi's hair. And he didn't reply, at first. "Was it anyone... important?"
Obito was quiet after that--not quite in agreement with him. Some people were important. But everyone? No. Not in his opinion. "Well," he said, at length. "At least there was that."
He tilted his head, then he leaned forward and set his cup down before shifting in place, twisting around to meet his gaze as he brought his hand up to touch his cheek. "Obito-nii, do you know how I picked my ANBU?"
"I went through every single shinobi record I had, even the genin, and carefully evaluated their skills. I learned their names and abilities, who had families and how old they were. Who had medical issues and who had what reprimands in their files for what, and who failed what sorts of missions. Now tell me, what does this mean for when I finally stepped into office?"
He was silent. That was a lot of work to do. A lot to learn about those people. But he couldn't guess what it meant, really. "I don't know," he admitted, after a time. "What?"
"It means that every nin in Konoha, from my best jounin to my worst genin, is a person to me. I know them, even if they don't like me, I know who they are, I know what they're good at. There is no one to blame if I send them to a mission they can't handle but myself for expecting more than they were ready for."
He thought about that, still trailing little touches along his collar, his shoulder. And he thought about the mission that had gone so very badly for him, Kakashi and Rin. He hadn't come back from that mission. What had Minato felt about that? Had it hurt him? He hoped that it had.
"That's good. Being Hokage is... is being a sacrifice. If I do things right, the glow reflects on my shinobi. If I I do things wrong, then the blame is mine. I can't trip and fall while carrying my village in my hands. They put their trust in me, and I need to be worthy of that trust."
"It's a lot," he remarked. "A lot to carry." And he paused, thinking over what his cousin had said. "You are worthy of it, though. As worthy as anyone could be."
He let out a soft breath, a hint of humor creeping into his voice. "It's not all bad though. Hiruzen-sama is perpetually in awe of the fact I manage to keep the paperwork down."
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Date: 2012-12-06 06:50 pm (UTC)He pushed the thought to the back of his mind, like he always did.
"Well. I'm proud of you, you know. For all of that."
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Date: 2012-12-06 08:32 pm (UTC)"...I can't imagine," he admitted quietly.
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December 2012
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